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Is it bad to always be thinking sexual stuff about girls? If it is, what am I supposed to do?

To begin with, your sexual attraction toward women is natural. There is nothing wrong about being sexually attracted to a girl. It is normal and healthy. Do not feel guilty about sexual attraction because it is not the same thing as lust. Just because you have strong desires, this does not mean that you are impure.

Lust is a different matter because it is a conscious act of the will to allow your mind to view another person as an object—a thing to be used for your pleasure. Therefore it is a distortion of love, and it will never satisfy. Sexual acts such as premarital sex—or imagining premarital sex—are always incomplete.

We deserve to have the fullness of love, but when we settle for lust, we sell ourselves short. In regard to what to do with tempting thoughts, I recommend what I have recommended elsewhere: If you have impure magazines, videos, and music, get rid of them. Be patient with yourself. Sexual thoughts are bound to come. Take it one day at a time, one minute at a time, and one thought at a time. Do not get overwhelmed. Purity of heart does not mean that you are never tempted and that you cease to be sexually attracted to others. Some people even think that they are pure just because they do not have strong desires or because they never had the opportunity to do something impure with a girl. This is not purity. To be pure requires an act of the will to love, not the absence of sexual desire.

One way to grow in purity is to be grateful for the beauty of women. Lust and true gratitude cannot coexist. So when you see attractive women, instead of thinking of them as mere temptations, be grateful that they are so amazing. Now, I’m not recommending you seek out gorgeous women for the sake of having more reasons to be thankful. Rather, be grateful for a woman’s beauty when you notice it, and then move on.

If you practice these these simple things you will find that as you grow in control over your mind, you will have greater control over your body.

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